During years of yoga studies, I learned that wanting and desiring are bad. The Yoga Sutra of Patanjali, one of the most important texts of yoga, presents the yamas and niyamas, which are the dos and don’ts of yogis. One of the niyamas is Santosha, which means contentment.

This principle means that we should develop inner contentment and be happy with whatever we have. It is believed that desires cause suffering, and that inner contentment is the only key for happiness, since achieving our goals just leads to new desires and therefore causes more suffering.

A few nights ago, I saw a George Bernard Shaw’s quote that reminded me of this approach. “There are two tragedies in life. One is to lose your heart’s desire. The other is to gain it.” A few years ago, I would have totally agreed, but I do not anymore. Today I can say with absolute certainty that obtaining my heart’s desires has brought me much happiness, whether it’s my marriage, my son, my fulfillment as an astrologer and a writer, my home, my friends, and my community.

Developing inner contentment is important. If I did not do my inner work, I could still be unhappy. But, if I decided to abandon my heart’s desires, most likely, I would not have been as happy as I am today.

There are still many aspirations that I haven’t fulfilled, and I admit that they cause me pain. I can therefore certainly relate to the never-ending nature of desires. But the pain I experience today is not comparable with the pain I felt ten years ago, when I still hadn’t fulfilled all those desires I previously mentioned. Today I know that I’ve got so many blessings and that even if I don’t get everything I want, I will still be genuinely grateful.

Today, I know to hold on to my desires while being content. This is, to my opinion, the true key for happiness. 

 Sometimes I wish that I did not care about being successful. Life could have been so much easier. Or could it?

According to the astrological approach that I practice, we each came to this world with a special birth chart that was meant just for us. Nothing in our chart was given to us without a reason. I have moon in Capricorn and Midheaven in Aries. It means that I came here to be ambitious. I always remind myself that the universe did not give me ambition for nothing. It gave it to me so that I can do great things in the world and succeed in doing them.

This is where I find the approach that sees desires as the root of our suffering to be flawed. Developing inner contentment is wonderful, but if we neglect our desires, we do not embody our authentic selves. People with ambitious charts, would be lying to themselves if they said they did not care about success. My belief is that being authentic is the most important thing, more than any spiritual or religious approach.

This week on Wednesday, December 21, the sun moves from Sagittarius to Capricorn. Sagittarius is the sign of optimism, fun, and thinking big. Sagittariuses want to succeed, and they want to enjoy the way. To me, this is one of the most important teachings of Sagittarius. It never serves us well to follow our hearts’ desires with stress and not with of joy.

Today I sometimes look back at all the years when I was looking for love. If only I knew that I would end up in a great loving marriage, I could have had so much more fun along the way. This is why, whenever I feel that I do not advance enough, I tell myself, “In a few years you will get what you want, and you will look back and say, if only I knew. Instead, know now. You will get what you want, or something even better.” This is the Sagittarius optimistic way, and it is so valuable, because it can truly transform our lives.

Capricorn is the sign of ambition, high standards, accomplishments, and achievements. When the sun enters Capricorn, we resume responsibility and start acting to achieve our big Sagittarius goals, with discipline and hard work. While we do that, we should also remember Sagittarius’ lessons. Enjoy the way, believe in yourself, and trust yourself. There is a reason why you want what you do.

December 21 is also the winter equinox. It is the darkest day of the year when we are asked to find our inner light and shine it out into the world. When we are honest and connected with our desires and act to achieve them with trust, faith, and optimism, it strengthens our sun energy. Then our light gets stronger and stronger and can easily overcome the darkness.

A few suggestions for contemplation or journaling:

• What do I want to achieve and still haven’t?
• How do I feel about wanting these things? Is there any feeling of guilt or shame around wanting them?
• How do I feel about desires in general? Do I believe that they are bad or good? Does my approach stand in my way or support me?
• Do I feel inner contentment, while still being connected to my desires?
• Do I act with an inner knowing that I will get what I want?
• Do I enjoy my way towards achieving my goals?

I’d love to hear from you what you think!

Wishing you a wonderful week and a happy holiday season,

With love,

Yael